Yesterday I pitched two ideas for articles to a magazine. One I had written up a few versions; the other I hadn't written anything yet. I included it because I figured two ideas was better than one. That turns out to be true because the editor liked only my second idea. I was struck momentarily with excitement: I finally submitted something that was not rejected! But I think I've got used to rejection because my next thought was oh shit! My terror was based on a spiral of self-doubting statements: what if I don't write what she wants? What if I can't get it together within the timeframe? What if it's not right for the magazine after all? What if I completely forget how to string words together and collapse into an incoherent mess for the next two weeks? I managed to calm down after making some notes of story ideas, deciding on a direction for the article, as well as some serious meditation. Now I'm off the roller-coaster of anxiety and able to hopefully write an engaging and relevant article over the weekend.
Has anyone else experienced a negative emotional response to a positive event?
What's in a name?
According to my Apple dictionary, admittedly not a definitive source, a ‘consideration’ is a thought, reflection, meditation, concern, rumination etc. I would like this blog to do those things. I’m hoping I can keep the posts positive because, as someone once reminded me, it is important to practise the habits of mind that you value and want to foster. For me those are: positivity, curiosity, openness and self-reflection (hence, a blog is a good forum).
Also, I’m calling them 'small' because I would like to try to get into the habit of blogging briefly but often. That way I can reflect on everyday occurrences and make this form of writing and thinking a habit, hopefully.
Friday, 29 August 2014
The terror of an acceptance (96/100)
Labels:
#100happydays,
acceptance,
anxiety,
commission,
rejection,
self-doubt,
writing
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